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[personal profile] cosette_valjean
I did not believe in ghosts or reincarnation for most of my life. Only in the past six years after very intense lucid dreaming have I begun to reshape my view of what is possible. What I am about to say may be complete bullshit and I'm alright with that. I'm ok with it being nebulous and a mere possibility. I've seen patterns and I thought perhaps I would write down what I have observed.

First of all the world I experience out of body in my dreams lucidly no matter how emotionally intense or visually stunning never quite has the same zing as being inside a body. There is no real pain although it is possible to feel echoes of it and there is very little sensual pleasure even though there is echoes of that as well. These nerves and brain sensations do quite a lot to our experience of existing. It brings it all home when your emotions and thoughts translate into bodily sensation. It is all just an ethereal exercise up until that point. Plus there is power here that is not as easily accessed while not in body. It's hard to describe exactly why that is or how that is. I just feel it like a child rejoicing in the flow of a river.

The draw to keep coming back is like the draw to keep breathing. Those who are awake enough can help mold themselves and their future lives. Those who just leap and do not look merely ride along the current sometimes stirring and sometimes slipping further into sleep. Life here is almost like a game in the sense that it is a continual challenge to test yourself and your capabilities. What can I do next? Where shall I go? Who shall I be? Will I do better here, I wonder? It's like sports. What new goal shall I set for myself?

I used to be horrified by the concept of never having a chance to just rest already from all the pain and trial but now I realize that is a thing of joy to have the hope of continual growth and experience and existence would be horribly boring without it. Plus there is a time of rest when one must regain the energy and learn all one can while out of body before going back.

Also personal energy is not limitless. It is possible to get stuck as a shadow of this bodily sphere if you are too attached to something there. You need energy to travel back to the non-body sphere and often spirits need help finding it and remembering how to go back. It's very comforting to me to know that we are all connected and help each other naturally. Some people help spirits even while unconscious in their second nature while they sleep. There are those stronger spirits who help continually those with questions and those who need guidance on how to help themselves and others. They seem like they have been without body for ages upon ages but I'm fairly certain they too will come back eventually to the body sphere for growth and power and because they often can touch the lives of many more while in body.

I've been thinking of free will and determinism lately. It seems to me that life has a mixture of both and not completely one or the other. An awake spirit decides what goals to strive for and sets its path and an asleep one lets his gut instinct and desires guide the path he will walk but each spirit then decides every second how he will react to his circumstances whether consciously chosen at one point or not. Will one grow or will one shrivel? And every choice affects the next circumstance.
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cosette_valjean

August 2009

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